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The Patchwork Quilt of Addiction

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Week Two - Emotions?


2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I guess it's a weird, middle-age thing that I have going on now. I've raised my kids, my wife has a new full-time career that she's putting all of her time and effort into and I'm getting tired. I've spent my entire adult life revolving myself around my family, and they all turned out great. I, too have a full-time, career-oriented position, but I've been there a long time and I kinda run the show. It's OK for me to slow it down a bit. So, I'm starting to have some 'free time' that I don't know what to do with. I used to simply smoke my free time away (how pathetic is that?). Well, that's not much of a problem if you think about it. Women often wonder why a man has a mid-life crisis. In my case, it's all about redefining who I am and where I'm going.(man, I'm getting too old for this). I quit drinking and smoking. Mmmm. One day at a time, I know... Peace. -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 11 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 333 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $60.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 49 [B]Seconds:[/B] 23

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey - You guys crack me up! I actually did get a massage a few years ago, it was pretty cool, I guess. I got it as a gift, I really wouldn't have paid for one myself. Like I said before, I don't really know how to relax. I am a confirmed workaholic (that's OK because I like my work). I keep real busy, but I don't do anything any one of you would consider relaxing or fun. Right now, talking back and forth with all of you is pretty entertaining! Ask your husbands, boyfriends, fathers, etc. for a few ideas and pass them on. I'm all ears (I mean eyes :)) ! -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 10 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 306 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $55 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 8 [B]Seconds:[/B] 5

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I begin day 10 tomorrow. No fanfare, please. My quit is going just fine, I'm just way too moody for my own good. By nature, I'm not an emotional person. I keep my true feelings deep inside where they belong. I know that no one wants to hear my problems. I been taught that, no matter what, be strong and don't show your weaknesses. Week two has been an emotional roller coaster for me and I hate it. One minute up, next down. No cravings, just up and down. I hate it. I'm a happy guy and I'm happy about my quit, but I'm really dragging a** this week. I'm getting a little wore down. So everyone calls this 'heck week'? Maybe this has something to do with it. This is getting old... -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 8 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 247 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $44 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 59 [B]Seconds:[/B] 3

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi 2tone - Love your posts. You're right! Keep them feelings inside and quit being a sissy. It'll all pass, trust me. If you need a night out with the boys, go for it. Just get through this week and things will get better... BTW - at leat you don't smell like an ashtray anymore... -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 8 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 249 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $44 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 11 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 0

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    $361,210.50

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

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    45868

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    688,020

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey - All of you are awesome! I appreciate all of your input...another work day came and went today and I have to tell you, it was a good one! You guys all nailed it...you have to ride this stage out as well. Everyone thinks that quitting is about the physical part but man, they're way off. I'm a manager where I work and have a very close relationship with my staff. They look to me for guidance and advice. When I'm down, it seems that they are, too. Conversely, when one of them are down, I'm the first one to help them. Add that to the fact that my family is looking for me to be the 'go-to' guy and there you have it...I've no time to (mentally) 'get over' smoking. It's not professional help that I need (there's not enough hours in the day, anyway), it's a little time to myself, I suppose. Since my quit date, I haven't even had a chance to sit back and reflect on my life changes. My life revolves around others, both personally and professionally. I know they need me. I don't have time to be weak or have issues of my own. No one would understand, anyway. I'm the strong one...(?) Well, if everyone thinks I'm that strong, I guess I have yet another thing to prove to them. Even though quitting has been semi-traumatic for me, I've barely spoken a word about it to my family, friends or co-workers. No one really even noticed that I quit. I don't really mention my personal quitting milestones to anyone (except you guys). To all of you, thanks for being there for me. -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 9 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 271 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $49.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 13 [B]Seconds:[/B] 38

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    $361,210.50

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

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    45868

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    688,020

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Kaiti and Karen (man, there's a lot of women in this group) - Thanks for the suggestions. I've never had a bubble bath with candles or a massage. It just a bit too (mmm, looking for polically correct word here) feminine for me. You guys are wonderful for the suggestions, but I don't know how to relax and I don't suppose I ever will. A cold beer and a football game? I don't know... I wonder what the man-to-women ratio is on this discussion board? Hey, all I know is that as long as you folks are here for me, I'll always have a place to go. Thanks. Peace. -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 10 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 287 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $55 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 34 [B]Seconds:[/B] 39

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    $361,210.50

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

    Minutes: 49 Seconds: 40

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    45868

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2tone
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18 years ago 0 175 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks everyone - I do remember from my last quit (a few years ago for 9 months), that this is same feeling that I could never shake. Up and down. The moodiness just seemed like it went on forever. Alas, I eventually caved. My point is that this is where I have to change something (my mindset, whatever) or I'm doomed to suffer the same consequences as last time. I know I won't smoke again, but, boy. do I remember THIS feeling. The attitude and lifestyle changes are the hardest part. Help me out with this one...anyone? -- 2tone [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 9 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 259 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $49.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 34 [B]Seconds:[/B] 32

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    $361,210.50

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    Days: 9584 Hours: 10

    Minutes: 49 Seconds: 40

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    45868

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    688,020

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Kaitilina
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Kaitilina
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18 years ago 0 983 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh my...2tone....I'm sooooo sorry. I feel horrible, but at the same time I feel a belly laugh coming on....just picturing my hubby in a bubble bath surrounded by candles and light music...it's almost to much to bare!!!! Again, my apologies....for you I recommend a nice Harley Davidson and the open road to distract you from the cravings....hehe [IMG]http://i136.photobucket.com/albums/q185/kaitilina/bikerboop.gif[/IMG] Kaiti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 11/7/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 59 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,312 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $324.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 15 [B]Seconds:[/B] 59
Kaitilina
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Kaitilina
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18 years ago 0 983 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
2tone, I recommend a really hot bath tonight with lot's of candles and really soft music (this really is great). Also, please remember, no matter how much we dislike how we react to stress and pressure as non-smokers (because it's so different as smokers), we can work through it, learn from our mistakes and react differently in the future. Don't be hard on yourself if your just not handling things like you used to (as diplomatic, or as calm). I have faith that it will come back, you just have to relearn a little how to handle "life and work" as a nonsmoker. Your doing fantastic!!!! Time for a reward for yourself!!! Kaiti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 11/7/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 58 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,291 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $319 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 32
Kaitilina
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Kaitilina
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18 years ago 0 983 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
2tone, I was you a few weeks back. I'm also like you in that I'm always the perky one..never a care in the world, and then my world came crashing down. I wasn't myself, just sad, moody, biting everyone's head off...I HATED IT!!!! But I refused to allow the addiction to work it's magic on me..I refused to allow myself to allow my mood make me smoke again. I had to do alot of soul searching and required some time by myself to take a long hard look at who I was and who I currently am, and who I eventually wanted to be as a non-smoker. I would not allow the addiction to take away who I really am deep inside. It's a slow process though. Be patient and give it lot's and lot's of thought. You can shake this mood...also a funny movie and surrounding yourself with uplifting friends helps too!!! Laughter is the best medicine sometimes. Post, and let us know how your doing...but DO NOT SMOKE!!! Kaiti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 11/7/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 58 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,287 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $319 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 45 [B]Seconds:[/B] 36

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