Healthy Mind Solutions

Home
Main Forum
Quit Smoking
Avoiding relapse and slipping
I should have fallen by now

Advanced Search Form

I should have fallen by now

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 813

Pokerbrat Listen here now...the reason that you are thinking as you are is that you are blaming yourself for these recent events. When we feel quilty isn't the next step to assign a suitable punishment? What better punishment than to hurt ourselves by smoking...Smoking is a way in which we say to ourselves we are not worthy of having a healty body, we are in some way bad or we have acted in a bad way...Now I don't know all of the specifics of your situation except those you have shared and as far as you son's dislike of the military, well no one that has ever worn the uniform has enjoyed boot camp and you are supposed to hate the DI, because that is the way that the military fosters group cohesion...The DI is the enemy and we are the unit that must stick together to survive...I am not surprised that he is finding this experience distasteful...That is not your fault, it is the way the military operates and he will, believe it or not, gain something from the experience. It was a long time ago for me, but I still remember the feelings... The other son's situation, I am not qualified to comment...That one troubles me deeply as I know that some kids feel such angst in this world that they will on occasion attempt such things. I would only advise you to seek help for him, that would be a much better action than punishing yourself by smoking... Also listen to elderone. the words in that post have a ring of truth and wisdom...I am honored to be in the same group as a person such as this... Stay well and vigilant my friend your sons need you now, as a source of solace in difficult times... nonic [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/25/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 249 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,470 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,743.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 45 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 44 [B]Seconds:[/B] 57

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

Of course stressful situations are big triggers. But we don't have to script ourselves into thinking we can't handle them without smoking. Rusty :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/13/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 991 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 27,748 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,468.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 139 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 20 [B]Seconds:[/B] 1

Quit Meter

$60,320.00

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 725 Hours: 18

Minutes: 40 Seconds: 48

Life Gained
Quit Meter

5800

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

232,000

Cigarettes Not Smoked

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 598

that's a fine line, Rusty..of course, we handled difficult situations, but, NOT WITHOUT SMOKING. Hence, stressful situations are a big trigger for almost everyone. new me [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/26/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 97 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,328 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $485.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 13 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 4 [B]Seconds:[/B] 38

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2462

PB, often we quitters say to ourselves that we used to cope by smoking or that we have to learn to cope now that we've quit. Well, some will probably disagree with me, but I don't believe that is true. You and I and everyone else here have coped with many, many things in our lives. We dealt with bills, neighbors, children, parents, death, accidents, illness. We DEALT with these things. We didn't just go out and smoke and NOT deal with them. Yes, we smoked...we walked outside and had a smoke to think it through or whatever, but we DID cope. We DID handle things. Personally, I handled a lot of pretty big issues and had some pretty big emotions as a smoker. There is no hiding from life, smoker or not. What this means to me is that we tell ourselves this little bitty lie when we are going through the pangs of quitting. The lie is "Oh my gosh, I can't cope without smoking." And that is a dangerous little lie, because it can make us feel weak and inadequate and ultimately not able to keep up the quit. Well, I'm saying YES YOU CAN. You did and you can. You have the strength within you because you have used it all your life. So let's stop tellling this lie to ourselves. We ARE strong. We CAN cope. Oh, and congratulations for 90 days. This is a huge milestone. Don't buy into the thought "it will be bad." Plan a pleasurable outing ... do something fun for yourself. You deserve it! Rusty :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/13/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 991 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 27,748 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,468.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 139 [B]Hrs:[/B] 18 [B]Mins:[/B] 5 [B]Seconds:[/B] 30

Quit Meter

$60,320.00

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 725 Hours: 18

Minutes: 40 Seconds: 48

Life Gained
Quit Meter

5800

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

232,000

Cigarettes Not Smoked

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 363

Thanks Anna and Martha, today marks 90 days! I took off of work today so I could have a 4 day weekend. I think I'll go back to bed and just sleep the morning away. My Mileage Smoke-Free Days: 90 Cigarettes Not Smoked: 4,336 Amount Saved: $864.00 Life Gained: Days: 13 Hrs: 2 Mins: 16 Seconds:

Quit Meter

$41,229.83

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 1106 Hours: 2

Minutes: 37 Seconds: 16

Life Gained
Quit Meter

6041

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

181,230

Cigarettes Not Smoked

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1151

Kudos pb! You've held onto your quit even when the chips were down, kicked around and then some. That is the mark of success! The next "phase" is moving from quitting as something you do to someone you are - a non-smoker. It will take a bit of time but it is the payoff for all the physical stuff that goes on in the first couple months. Dig deep and look at all you've accomplished in 90 DAYS! One last thought about the son in bootcamp. It may sound like he is not doing well (I can't pretend to know the details) and on a superficial level, it sounds like your quit is going badly for you... but you know that it is the best thing for you and will get better as you keep going. Maybe it will be the same for your son? All the best [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/5/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1120 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 22,400 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $5,040.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 85 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 9 [B]Seconds:[/B] 55

Quit Meter

$40,417.00

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 706 Hours: 3

Minutes: 47 Seconds: 44

Life Gained
Quit Meter

6218

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

80,834

Cigarettes Not Smoked

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2417

Poker, remember this is not a good time for you as it is around your 90 day mark. I craved like crazy around then but knew I had come to far to jump ship. Please just hang on a little longer, things will get better. Some day when you are an old man and you are feeling so good because you quit smoking in your early 40's you will remember my advice! Stop by the bonfire and throw in some frustrations. It just got started. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/8/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 234 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,510 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $982.80 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 21 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 28

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 363

I'm just trying to be honest with myself Anna. I'm trying to figure out why I'm thinking the way I'm thinking when things get bad. I know they're bad, they stink, they kill us eventually. But yet so many do it. I think it's that stupid way of thinking, the old "it will never happen to me" way of thinking, that keeps them smoking. Thanks for keeping me in line Anna :-) My Mileage Smoke-Free Days: 89 Cigarettes Not Smoked: 4,284 Amount Saved: $854.40 Life Gained: Days: 12 Hrs: 22 Mins: 33 Seconds: 14

Quit Meter

$41,229.83

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 1106 Hours: 2

Minutes: 37 Seconds: 16

Life Gained
Quit Meter

6041

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

181,230

Cigarettes Not Smoked

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2417

Pokerbrat, I am going to boop you one...Yes, cigarettes were there for us, because we choose to travel to the store to pay for them. They were not free and they only make us sick. They are poisonous and they stink. ;) You are doing great by the way! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/8/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 234 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,510 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $982.80 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 21 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 26

18 years ago 0 +0 / -0 363

Thanks Janna!! Doing much better today. Your words of encouragement really helped me, thank you so much. My Mileage Smoke-Free Days: 89 Cigarettes Not Smoked: 4,284 Amount Saved: $854.40 Life Gained: Days: 12 Hrs: 22 Mins: 33 Seconds: 14

Quit Meter

$41,229.83

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 1106 Hours: 2

Minutes: 37 Seconds: 16

Life Gained
Quit Meter

6041

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

181,230

Cigarettes Not Smoked

Reading this thread:

today's top discussions:

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Active

Most Loved

I should have fallen by now